Autism Night Before Christmas (poem)...

A friend forwarded this poem to me and I wanted to share it with you. It is written from the perspective of a mother of a child with autism. Although not all of it applies to my specific situation, I can relate to much of what is expressed here.

If you are a parent of a child with autism (or other special needs), I hope that you find it as moving and inspirational as I did. If you are a parent of a "neurotypical" child, I hope that you learn something from these words, as I also have learned from my own experience with my beautiful daughter, Katelyn.

Autism Night Before Christmas
by Cindy Waeltermann

Twas the Night Before Christmas
And all through the house
The creatures were stirring
Yes, even the mouse

We tried melatonin
And gave a hot bath
But the holiday jitters
They always distract

The children were finally
All nestled in bed
When nightmares of terror
Ran through my OWN head

Did I get the right gift
The right color
And style
Would there be a tantrum
Or even, maybe, a smile?

Our relatives come
But they don't understand
The pleasure he gets
Just from flapping his hands.

"He needs discipline," they say
"Just a well-needed smack,
You must learn to parent…"
And on goes the attack

We smile and nod
Because we know deep inside
The argument is moot
Let them all take a side

We know what it's like
To live with the spectrum
The struggles and triumphs
Achievements, regressions…

But what they don't know
And what they don't see
Is the joy that we feel
Over simplicity

He said "hello"
He ate something green!
He told his first lie!
He did not cause a scene!

He peed on the potty
Who cares if he's ten,
He stopped saying the same thing
Again and again!

Others don't realize
Just how we can cope
How we bravely hang on
At the end of our rope

But what they don't see
Is the joy we can't hide
When our children with autism
Make the tiniest stride

We may look at others
Without the problems we face
With jealousy, hatred
Or even distaste,

But what they don't know
Nor sometimes do we
Is that children with autism
Bring simplicity.

We don't get excited
Over expensive things
We jump for joy
With the progress work brings

Children with autism
Try hard every day
That they make us proud
More than words can say.

They work even harder
Than you or I
To achieve something small
To reach a star in the sky

So to those who don't get it
Or can't get a clue
Take a walk in my shoes
And I'll assure you

That even 10 minutes
Into the walk
You'll look at me
With respect, even shock.

You will realize
What it is I go through
And the next time you judge
I can assure you

That you won't say a thing
You'll be quiet and learn,
Like the years that I did
When the tables were turned……

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas!

Last week, my mother, grandmother, and I decided to brave the idea of taking the girls to get their picture taken with Santa. Last year, it was not a good experience and, as you may recall, I had to sit in the picture, which was completely unplanned (hence my clashing outfit, no make-up, etc.). I was determined that there was no way I was going to be photographed this year!

I had prepped Katelyn to see Santa days before so that she would hopefully not be scared of him. She was excited to see "Santa's house" and she practiced her smile with Mimi (my mother) all morning long. What I didn't expect was that Ashley would be the one who would be completely freaked out!

As soon as we arrived at the mall, Katelyn was talking about Santa. She was excited to see the big tree and all of the decorations around Santa's chair. She needed no encouragement to come say hi to Santa and to give him a high-five. Ashley also came over fairly willingly to give Santa a high-five. However, it got interesting when I tried to put Ashley on his lap. That is when the wailing began! She was not having it!

And then poor Katelyn got a little freaked out (no tears, though, thank God) and stood back from Santa and said, "All done Santa." Santa then brought out two gift boxes for the girls to sit on instead of his lap. Katelyn sat on the gift box with no hesitation. Ashley, however, refused and tried to run away. I decided to sit on the box and have Ashley stand in front of me. This worked and Ashley stopped crying. I then told Santa (and the photographer) that I was NOT going to be in the picture. Santa disagreed. He told me that there was no way the kids were going to be okay with me leaving.

Recalling last year's photo, I reiterated that I was not going to be in the photo. I told the photographer to let me sneak out before snapping the picture. Somehow, I managed to "sneak" my 8-month-pregnant body out from behind Ashley without her noticing and I quickly ran to hide behind some props. Miraculously, Ashley didn't budge and the photographer was able to snap the photo. I couldn't believe it!

After we were done "torturing" Ashley and I was choosing the photo package, Katelyn stayed with Santa, talking up a storm about her beloved Giraffe. I wish we could have gotten a picture of this moment. It was so sweet seeing her have a conversation with Santa. She has come so far in just one year and we have so much to be grateful for this holiday season.

Katelyn Sings Her Favorite Songs...

Since Katelyn loves to sing, her teacher was kind enough to make us a CD of the music that they sing at preschool. On Thanksgiving, Katelyn entertained us by singing and dancing to her favorite songs: Baby Beluga and Moon, Moon, Moon. I captured this on video, as well as her singing some Christmas songs a few days later.