I Finally Have My Girl Back...

For the past few months, Katelyn seemed to be slipping away. She would no longer feed herself independently, watch her favorite TV shows, play with her toys, walk up and down stairs, etc. She even stopped singing and clapping. Overall, she seemed very unhappy, as if she was locked inside herself and couldn't break out. But with some help, Katelyn has returned.

Since it wasn't clear if she wouldn't, or simply couldn't, do certain things that she used to do, we were not exactly sure how to handle the situation. If she truly could not do these things, it would not be fair to her for us to try to force her to do so. However, if she was just choosing not to do certain things, this would be a behavior issue that could be corrected.

Exactly one week ago, I decided it was time to try to break Katelyn free, if possible. For some reason, she would no longer enter our kitchen for the past few months, so I decided to start there. I also wanted to tackle the self-feeding issue since she was only eating if I shoved the food into her mouth. I already have an 8-month-old who cannot self-feed, so as you can imagine, having to feed my 2.5-year-old as well was time-consuming and exhausting.

So I picked Katelyn up and brought her into the middle of the kitchen. She was not happy, but she lied down on the floor. I got out one of her favorite snacks and put them in a bowl. She really wanted the snack, but she got very upset that I refused to put them in her mouth for her. I held the bowl and told her that she needed to take them out herself. She began to cry and protest, hoping that I would give in. However, after enough time went by, she finally took one out and shoved it in her mouth reluctantly. It was like a battle of wills, not against me, but against herself. I praised her a ton and then I put the bowl down on the floor, no longer holding it for her. Once again, after some tantruming, she finally took one out of the bowl. Again, more praise. All in all, it took an hour and a half to get her to successfully feed herself, but it was worth every minute. This was a huge breakthrough!

I then decided to see if she would feed herself at the coffee table, since she had been refusing to even go near it for months. I put the bowl on the table and turned on Blue's Clues. With some prompting and reassurance, she finally went over to the table and fed herself. I praised and praised her. She became very excited to receive the praise. I could see the pride that she felt. It was then that I knew that she was not incapable of doing things that she once did, she just lacked the confidence. It was like she just got stuck in a rut and didn't know how to get out, but I opened up the door for her. Finally, my happy girl was back!

As if a magic switch had been turned on, Katelyn quickly resumed to many of her old activities. She now walks up and down the stairs completely independently, feeds herself (she even used a fork and spoon tonight and she did well!), doesn't require Mama and Dada to be in the same room with her all of the time, and she even has been incredibly sweet with her baby sister. She is constantly laughing and smiling, and you can just see the difference in her. Also, her language has just exploded and she is actually starting to form sentences! And to think, just a few months ago, we weren't sure if she would ever say more than one- or two-word phrases.

Also, her ABA therapy started last week and Katelyn is doing amazingly well. She already has a bond with her ABA therapist, Aimee, and she is enjoying the one-on-one sessions. And now that she has the language skills, we are able to see just how smart she truly is. She continues to amaze me every day.

Katelyn has taught me many things in her short life so far, but one of the most important lessons that I have learned is to cherish the small accomplishments and never take anything for granted. When you have a child with autism or developmental delays, you really hold onto the little successes, and if and when your autistic child reaches the "normal" milestones, even if it takes months or years longer than other children, it is truly euphoric. It is almost like witnessing a miracle because it isn't definite that your autistic child will ever do some of the things that other children do naturally. After witnessing, and being a part of, Katelyn's recent breakthrough, I feel on top of the world. I finally have my girl back, and I am never letting her go.