"Where There Is Great Love, There Are Always Miracles"...

Since my last post, Katelyn has had significant ups and downs. Back in June, she was again admitted to the PPHP program due to her severe aggression and self-injurious behavior. She was placed on Zoloft and her Risperdal was increased. She was then discharged in mid-July and she returned to her preschool for the last few weeks of the summer program. During this time, she had significant difficulties both at home and at school.

After the summer session ended, there was a 4-week break, during which time she was showing significant regression in terms of her behavior. It was quite apparent that she could not deal with breaks in her schooling, as evidenced by her PPHP admissions and 3-week stay at Children's Hospital, all occurring after school breaks. At this point, we were considering out-of-district placement to a school that would specialize in dealing with children similar to Katelyn, exhibiting both characteristics of autism as well as psychiatric issues. Her psychologist, developmental pediatrician, primary care physician, and neuropsychologist were all in agreement that there was sufficient reason to believe that she could no longer function in a public school setting, and out-of-district placement was recommended.

I met with the school to discuss our concerns, and they were very concerned as well. They have been wonderful to Katelyn and her family throughout all of our struggles, and they truly care deeply for her. The school psychologist and adjustment counselor became part of her team and we decided that it was worth giving it another shot at her preschool since that is the ideal place for her, if possible. Her teacher suggested that all members of her team be included on an email list so that we can all be on the same page and communicate about Katelyn's treatment, which has helped tremendously. And, boy, did Katelyn surprise all of us!

Expecting the worst, we were shocked to hear that she did well the first few days of school, and even enjoyed taking the bus again! We were still cautious, wondering if the "honeymoon period" would end like it almost always did, but it has continued! And I am so happy to report that she has drastically improved ever since! She is now playing with Ashley on a daily basis -- they are like best friends now, with the occasional fight, but nothing out of the ordinary for "typical" sibling rivalry. Just weeks before, she wasn't even able to be in the same room as Ashley, and sometimes not even on the same level of the house, without having a complete meltdown. Now she gets upset if she can't be with Ashley!

Who knows what the reasons are for her significant improvements -- perhaps her medication, perhaps the hard work and dedication of her family, school staff, and therapeutic supports, perhaps the fact that we turned our dining room into a play room, perhaps a sudden developmental growth on her part, perhaps all of the prayers and love that so many people have shared with us -- whatever the cause, it is a true miracle.

We have seen what Hell is like, believe me. But having gone through all of the difficulties over the past year, and coming through them alive and intact, we've grown stronger, and we will never, ever give up hope, no matter what obstacles may come our way in the future. We now have a taste of Heaven and we will never let it go.

(Quote by Willa Cather)

Step 1: Parent Interview at the Autism Diagnostic Center...

This morning was the first step in Katelyn's reevaluation process, the parent interview at the autism diagnostic center. Kevin was up all night sick, so I ended up going on my own. Thankfully, I was also armed with a very informative letter from Katelyn's amazing preschool teacher, explaining in detail how Katelyn's behavior has affected her at school.

I mentioned how far Katelyn has come since her diagnosis in terms of her autistic symptoms, and that, aside from the behavior piece, sometimes it seems like she doesn't even have autism, but the doctor pointed out some things to me that demonstrate that she is definitely on the spectrum, which actually was reassuring to me. (I know that must sound strange, but lately I've been going back and forth on an emotional rollercoaster wondering if she is indeed autistic or if this is something entirely different going on.) She said that although Katelyn has shown significant improvement in many of her symptoms, Katelyn is still exhibiting signs of autism. For example, although her speech has dramatically improved, her pragmatic language is not there, and it sounds to her like Katelyn is sometimes using delayed echolalia and scripting to communicate. She is also still labeling and listing things (for example, I told her how she talks about school and she will go down the list of kids, teacher/aides, etc. "I ready to see Olivia, I ready to see Jason, and Ryan, and Miss Lauren, and Sabrina..."), she cannot have a back-and-forth conversation yet, etc. Also, her social skills are still way behind. She also pointed out that even though she is not flapping anymore, she is turning that into something else, like her fingers overlapping (what I call the lobster claw hand --a strange thing she does with her index and middle finger) or clenching her fists like she is upset or anxious.

In terms of the behavior issues, she asked if we've had a functional behavior analysis (FBA) done before and I said no. She said that Katelyn's behavior is out of her realm (and she's a top expert on autism!) and that we definitely need to get an FBA done as soon as possible. This will involve having a team come to the home and school environments to observe what is going on and take data and attempt to implement some strategies for us to use. She agreed that Katelyn's behavior is very puzzling and hard to figure out. She suggested possibly negative attention seeking behavior, but also recommended genetic testing because some genetic disorders can cause regression like this, especially the all of a sudden not showing interest in previously enjoyed things or activities. I told her that some genetic testing was done around the time of suspected seizures back in Jan 2009 and she said she would like to see the results from the neurologist. She does not think it is a yeast/bacteria issue related to the pneumonia/antibiotics because she said, in her opinion, that there is no way it would last this long. She emphasized the importance of consistency on the part of her parents, teachers, and caregivers. She even mentioned that this is serious enough that if we do not get help for her now, Katelyn could end up having to go to a special school or even in a residential program somewhere, NOT because of her autism or lack of cognitive skills, but because of her behavior. If that isn't serious, I don't know what is. She did agree that it sounds like this is something other than the autism going on in addition to, and probably made worse by, the autism.

So, that is where we are at so far. Now we have to wait until April 1st (date was changed) for her evaluation. I also got her an appointment with a child psychologist for next week, so hopefully she will be able to help us in the interim with how to try to deal with her behavior at home, as well as at school.

Thanks for all of the good thoughts and prayers in this difficult time. I will be sure to keep you all up to date on what is going on in this reevaluation process.

"Coat On Bye Bye Car Swing"...

Word for word, this was Katelyn's way of telling us two days ago that she wanted to go to the park so she could swing. Given the fact that we live in New England and there was a ton of snow on the ground, I told her that the swings were closed because it was winter. Of course, she did not like that answer, and she kept on pressing: "Coat on baby's, coat on Dada's, coat on Mama's!" Saying "coat on" (usually followed by "bye bye car") is her way of saying that she wants to leave.

After listening to her plead with all her heart, Kevin and I decided why not! It actually was 50 degrees on Sunday, so despite the snow, it was a mild day (aside from the horrendous wind). We dressed the girls in their snowsuits, plopped them in the van, along with the sled, and we headed over to the nearby park. Katelyn was beyond ecstatic that we were actually going to the swings!

Once we arrived, Katelyn saw the swingset and started screaming, "Boo wing! Boo wing!" (Blue swing, because it is a blue swingset.) We traipsed through the snowy field to get to the swing. I pushed Katelyn on the swing while Kevin pulled Ashley in the sled for the first time. The girls had a great time. The best part was that it was completely Katelyn's idea and that she was able to communicate it so well.

Here are some pictures from our little snowy adventure...