Right Back Where We Started From...

It has been quite a while since I last posted and a lot has happened since (including the birth of our baby boy, Trevor Kyle, in January!)

In December, Katelyn had a bout of pneumonia and it really set her back. Up until then, she had been really progressing well. However, being very sick for over a week, coupled with then being out of school for winter recess, she really regressed in terms of her behavior and willingness to do things independently. Her control issues also escalated and she became even more demanding than before.

After doing some research and talking with other parents of children with autism, we decided to try a course of Nystatin since she was on amoxicillin for the pneumonia and antibiotics often can cause an overgrowth of yeast in the body, especially in children with autism. We have yet to see any improvement. In fact, as time goes on, her behavior has been getting far worse, both at home and now at school.

We are now suspecting that something else is going on in addition to her autism that is causing her to behave this way. Her teacher and therapists have never encountered a child like Katelyn and they are as baffled as we are. We have tossed around the idea that perhaps it is obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) or even depression that is causing her to be so demanding and controlling, but now we are leaning more towards oppositional defiant disorder (ODD). I had heard of ODD way back when I first read about autism, but at the time I did not feel that Katelyn fit that profile whatsoever. Now, however, she seems to fit it to a tee.


Here is a brief description of oppositional defiant disorder:

In children with Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD), there is an ongoing pattern of uncooperative, defiant, and hostile behavior toward authority figures that seriously interferes with the youngster’s day to day functioning. Symptoms of ODD may include:

• Frequent temper tantrums
• Excessive arguing with adults
• Often questioning rules
• Active defiance and refusal to comply with adult requests and rules
• Deliberate attempts to annoy or upset people
• Blaming others for his or her mistakes or misbehavior
• Often being touchy or easily annoyed by others
• Frequent anger and resentment
• Mean and hateful talking when upset
• Spiteful attitude and revenge seeking

We have been seeing an increase in aggression both towards herself and to others, especially to her sister, Ashley. Thank God she has not directed any of this towards Trevor, but I worry that it is only a matter of time before the novelty wears off. She is also starting to hit other children at school without any reason other than the fact that they walked by her. She has been increasingly demanding and controlling, and she deliberately seeks to annoy or upset others, especially me unfortunately, probably because I am the main disciplinarian since I am with her the most. She will purposely defy us, even if it means forfeiting privileges that she earned, and begged for, moments earlier. If we say yes, she says no. If we say no, she says yes. Every single aspect of our lives with Katelyn has become a constant battleground. She cuts off her nose to spite her face.

Because this is interfering with her at school and at home, we have decided to pursue psychiatric evaluation for Katelyn. Our first step is going to be getting her re-evaluated by the same doctor who diagnosed her autism. This will take place in March and we will get the results of the evaluation mid-April. We also put her name on a waiting list for a local center specializing in children's behavioral health, but they said that we will most likely not hear from them for at least two months to book an evaluation.

So now the waiting begins once again...the not knowing...the hoping that getting a diagnosis will offer some sort of help for our child and our family as a whole. We are right back where we started from when we first began this journey back in 2008, but this time it feels much different to me.

When receiving the diagnosis of autism, I threw myself into advocating for my child and learning as much as I could about autism, but this is really affecting me to my core. I cannot express how difficult it is to deal with the fact that your child may have a disorder that causes her to want to purposely upset you, or that creates such turmoil inside of her that she no longer enjoys things that she used to because she is in a constant battle within herself. I am often reminded of the nursery rhyme line: "And when she was good, she was very, very good, but when she was bad, she was horrid." And what makes it worse is that I know in my heart that this is NOT my child...this is not who she was just a few short months ago. And I will do everything in my power to ensure that this is not who she will be forever.

More Than We Bargained For...

It is a good thing that I did not bet money on how Katelyn would respond to getting the electrodes stuck to her head because she did way better than I had anticipated! Of course, she was not happy about it, but after the first few minutes, she did great and no sedation was required. The nurses and doctors were all amazing throughout our stay. They brought in some toys for Katelyn, one of which was a tube with beads that sound like rain when they fall. This became her "go-to" toy whenever anyone was going to mess with her head (no pun intended). She would shout, "Beads! Beads!" and we would quickly distract her with the bead tube. They also wheeled in her very own DVD player so she could watch Dora as much as she wanted to, much to our chagrin :)

Things definitely did not go as planned from the get-go; there were some good and some bad surprises. They did allow Kevin to stay with me, which was a huge relief for me. Even with the two of us there, it was still not easy to be stuck in a tiny hospital room with a 2.5-year-old who demands 24-hour attention from Mama and Dada. The food was obviously not meant for human consumption, so that was quite disappointing. We ended up living on ice coffees and donuts for the most part since there was a Dunkin' Donuts in the building, thank God.

Our 24-hour EEG turned into an exhausting 72-hour EEG because, despite the fact that Katelyn was exhibiting concerning behaviors multiple times a day prior to hospitalization, she did not demonstrate even ONE single event while admitted. Isn't it ironic (insert sarcastic smiley face here). The neurologist wanted to be sure that he did all that he could to attempt to witness any seizure activity, but unfortunately it never occurred. Therefore, we are still not 100% sure that she is not having seizures, but it certainly is promising that she did not show any signs of seizures while under observation. We were really hoping that she would do that strange behavior, even if just to rule out that it is a seizure so we would know for the future, but the good thing is that she has not had one of those events since, so we are optimistic for the moment.

As if being in the hospital for three nights with a 2.5-year-old wasn't enough, the worst was yet to come. Shortly after we put her down for the evening on the last night, Katelyn started throwing up all over herself. Even poor Giraffe got his fair share. She continued to be sick until around 1 a.m., but then finally slept the rest of the night. The next morning, the doctor told us that they wanted to keep her for a few hours after her electrodes were removed, just to be sure that she was okay since she had vomited the night before and there was a GI bug going around the floor. Right as we were about to be discharged, the nurse checked her temp and it was 102. The doctor said that he would keep her if we chose, but we were so sick of being in that hospital that we decided to take her home. Unfortunately, she threw up all over herself in the van when we were only a few minutes from the house.

The next morning, I ended up becoming violently ill, and by that evening, Kevin was also extremely sick. Neither one of us were in any condition to take care of ourselves, let alone Katelyn, but we did what we had to do, even when she woke in the night vomiting again. Luckily, Kevin's parents were gracious enough to keep Ashley so that she would not get sick too. We finally seem to be on the mend now, and Ashley is finally home with us after being at Grammy and Papa's for a week.

So, all in all, it certainly was not a dream vacation, and we didn't get any concrete answers, but at least it was memorable. I'm sure we will look back and laugh at this some day.

Giraffe and Dada got "hats" too...

Katelyn lined up her animals and played with balloons...

With Mama when we arrived/with Dada on the last day...